How to be Calm -3 Tips I learnt from my Dad 

 

 

Calm down ….Calm down …..

Why  this phrase ” Calm Down ”  has to be used so often? – sometime we tend to say it to any of our friends or vice-versa. What puts us in stressful situations ? Do we actually need to calm down ? What should be done to calm ourselves ? Any tips ?

Almost daily I can hear someone asking in the office – ” Agli chutti kab hai yaar ?”( When is any  next holiday coming up ?)  Why does it happen that we are  waiting for the weekend or any other next holiday ? Even I question myself why I always wait for the weekend ? And it is not like that weekend becomes a complete rest for me . I am a mom , a homemaker – How can I sit idle ? I have scheduled  lots of pending works for the weekend . I have to do laundry , dusting , have to do chopping -grinding  of veggies as a pre -preparation for the next weekend , have to help my daughter in her school project , have to color my hair, etc.etc. So I am not free even when it is holiday . But then what is the reason I wait for my next holiday from office ? Why ? I analyzed that there are  some stressful situations which I want to run away from at least for a day .

At home also , after a gap of few days or may be one or two months , we tend to say ” Chalo yaar kahin ghoom ke aaate hain ” . Notice we are not even comfortable at home . It means the home or the family life  also is somewhat putting us in stressful situations and our mind needs to get away from that jhik-jhik . Run away from that fuss and feel Calm .

My Dad taught me some  tips that help me many times whenever I am in any stressful situation . The tips actually work .

3 Useful Tips to Be Calm :——

1.Everything matters but nothing matters Much .  My Dad has taught me this principle as a fundamental to be    calm .

The plan you made has failed ? No problem , It doesn’t matter Much . Move on to your second plan which was kept as a back-up .

Your boss assigned you an additional task ? DMM – Doesn’t matter much . He found only you  capable of handling it .

Your spouse said something unhapppy ? DMM- Doesn’t matter much . He/She must be tensed . Try to find what he is going through . Just pass a smile and most probably a smile will be returned back .

Of course there are many situations that definitely matter Much – e.g. some health problem or some family dispute . We do need to take serious concern for that and give the situation our full attention and love . How we show the caring attitude at that time -that  definitely matters Much .

But the tiny little things in the routine life that make us stressed can definitely  be avoided with  the principle  DMM(Doesn’t matter Much)

2. Follow the Middle Path    Middle path is the best path Be you are in any of the situations . It can keep you happy and satisfied .

You want to go for a vacation but are worried about the expense ? Follow the middle path . Fly  while going and enjoy the train journey for  the return . In this way you saved the costly  air journey one way and your pocket smiled . I did so on my Nepal vacation .

Your friend played a trick with you ? You felt angry ? want to fight ? Follow the middle path . Just avoid your friend without uttering even a single wrong word . Your silence would reflect your anger and your friend may realize his mistake .

3. Overthinking will destroy your mood . Breathe and let go !

The daily life’s chaos put us in overthinking mode . We tend to create problems and tensions about  the situations unnecessarily . Thinking always of what went wrong , what can go wrong , why did someone behave like that , why is it happening just with Me ? Think Think Think ……How much ? Till when ?

My dad always says -Stop Overthinking . Distract your mind from the situation that is forcing you to overthink . Get busy in some other work . You are not meant to solve all the problems . Time is also a great healer . Let the problems get solved on their own with time .

Stop worrying about what made you unhappy today. Think of the things that can make you happy tomorrow . Get excited and work in that direction .

Are you sometimes frustrated with your job ? Are you the one who say ” Kahan fas gaye yaar ?” Think ,Think ,Look for  better job options . But till then  please Stop overthinking and fussing about your present job . You are earning good , better than many others . Go to cafe and enjoy coffee  with burger !

Did something make you cry today ? No problem . Don’t overthink about the person or the happening that made you cry . Your tears relaxed you . Now wipe away ,breathe and talk to a friend with whom you  can have a hearty laugh .

There are many ways we can invent for ourselves to be calm . It is in our hands only . Life is very short . Let’s try to live  Simple , Satisfied and Calm .

I am taking my Alexa rank to the next  level with #Myfriendalexa and this is my fourth post under the theme #LetusKISS

Hey ! Don’t you know what is #LetusKISS ? Yes Yes !  Let Us KISS . Read here . Also here . Some more KISS  here .

See you next time ! Ok TaTa !

 

 

 

 

Monika

Hi, I am Monika, an educationist for the last 17 years and a mom to a daughter for the last 11 years . Give me a hot cup of masala tea with some snacks plus a laptop and I am happy ! My Blog is a mixed bag of my observations ,learnings and experiences . To me , life is love, life is helping & learning from each other. Life is not that complex -We just have to stop overthinking .

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20 Responses

  1. Akshata says:

    some brilliant tips from your dad Monika.. Life is indeed stressful and while there are 101 reasons to be unhappy we need to find reasons to come out of the unhappy state and seek our happiness for its just one life. why waste it crying on things that are often beyond our control.

  2. Manpreet says:

    Those are some great tips, full of wisdom that comes only with the age. Thank you for sharing this with the world… I personally could use these tips to stay more calm and composed.

  3. Sudip Saha says:

    True that.. difference in thoughts can bring about a change in our lives

  4. Tina says:

    Overthinking really stresses me out. These are some brilliant tips Monika.

  5. Mahak says:

    I am a victim of overthinking but I really find it hard to calm my mind. I guess keeping myself constructively occupied is the best way to keep all those thoughts out

  6. Excellent post. I also follow LET GO path. I was once a impatient person who used to get stressed for every other thing. But I changed myself once my doc said stress is shadowing my true abilities. My first rule for stressful situation is Deep Breath and then LET GO.

  7. Such brilliant tips you have learnt from your dad and so beautifully our parents explain to us the beauty of life.

  8. Surbhi says:

    Now that is a useful post! Nothing matters that much… I am going to keep repeating that to myself! Thanks for sharing these great tips!

  9. Kavita Singh says:

    The life that we are living in this technology fulfilled era is so stressful that these pointers are must for everyone to follow. A small break from the daily hustle bustle of life is always welcome. Loved reading your post.

  10. Tina Acharya says:

    Beautiful!! I loved all the tips. My father too used to give lots of advice on many things. Loved the MIDDLE PATH advice most!!

  11. Reading this post reminded me of all those times when i used to loose my cool and yet my dad (whom i call pappa) used to stay super calm and used to get things done! That is something i determined to learn through his example and I constantly try and maintain my cool even at worst of the situations.

  12. Ranjini says:

    I beg to differ with respect to the friend who did something wrong. The middle path according to me will be not to yell at him or not to ignore him. It will be to talk it out and tell him how much he hurt me. There’s a high chance that he didn’t Know he hurt you unless you tell him

  13. I do follow some of the tips u mentioned in ur post from ur dad view and it works really well

  14. Neha says:

    Perfect tips! I totally agree that nothing matters much in the end.

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