A Letter to my Unborn Child

 

 

My unborn child

Within first year of my marriage , I had to undergo abortion.  It was followed by the feelings  of sadness, pain (more of sentimental), loss  and regret. A   loving bond  with my  unborn child that  had started nurturing , had to breakdown within  few weeks . Today I express my emotions  in this letter to my Unborn Child.

A Letter to my Unborn Child 

I held you inside me for few weeks ,but didn’t get a chance to hold you in my arms.  I felt your heartbeat  inside me , but couldn’t  welcome you in the world  outside.

God didn’t give us a chance to cuddle  with each other , but  the memories of your little movements inside my tummy  are afresh in my mind.  Your little kicks didn’t hurt me but used to bring smile on my face.

We were growing our emotional bond when God suddenly changed his plans. We were not allowed to continue our love for long but the bond we made even in those few weeks  , is  precious for me , and  it always would be.

When Doctor laid me on hospital bed , a long instrument was used to dislodge you from me .  I know that the pain you felt must have been much much more than me.

But my dear Baby , I was helpless. I felt paralyzed to save you.  My helplessness flowed in the form of tears. I am  so sorry that I couldn’t save  you Baby !  I still don’t know whether you were a girl or a boy but I loved you so much my dear !

Letter to my daughter written on the eve of International women’s day 

Even today , after so many years , occasionally  I am reminded of  that attachment &  love which then sneaks out of my eyes and roll down my cheeks, sometimes wets my writing papers.  I do wipe away that liquid love but it feels impossible to  ever  be able to wipe away the love I had with you, as you were my first child, although Unborn Child.

My unborn child

This post is written as a part of #chatterprompts by Blogchatter

Unborn child

Linking to #quotedstories

 

 

 

Monika

Hi, I am Monika, an educationist for the last 17 years and a mom to a daughter for the last 11 years . Give me a hot cup of masala tea with some snacks plus a laptop and I am happy ! My Blog is a mixed bag of my observations ,learnings and experiences . To me , life is love, life is helping & learning from each other. Life is not that complex -We just have to stop overthinking .

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13 Responses

  1. Amrita says:

    Don’t feel sad Monika.I am sure God had a plan so that your baby could be born stronger.No life is ever lost.The energy remains and is reborn.

  2. I am so sorry for your loss and I can understand your emotions and pain…it is disheartening and I know that child loss is not just a loss, it is an indescribable journey of survival. time is the only thing that heals wounds and a broken heart.

  3. Gods plans are something we can only bow down to; many peeps say that feel blessed for He felt you were the right person for delivering this soul to him! Hugs to you Monika

  4. Upasna says:

    It’s sad for a Mother to go through this but I m sure God had something good in store. They gave you a beautiful and strong daughter. Thanks for linking up with #QuotedStories Monika.

  5. Namratha says:

    It is such a difficult thing to bare your heart like this. More power and strength to you Monika.

  1. February 9, 2018

    […] It is not easy to bare your soul and talk about things that hurt. Monika, we are proud of the letter that you wrote. More power to you and all those who wrote beautiful letters to their parent / child. You can read the winning post here: http://alubhujia.com/en/2018/02/03/letter-unborn-child/ […]

  2. February 11, 2018

    […] Read my appreciated  #chatterprompts post : A letter to my unborn child  […]

  3. March 7, 2018

    […] You may want to read  the letter I wrote  to my unborn child  […]

  4. April 14, 2018

    […] You can read the post I wrote on my abortion  […]

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